


Frostbite

by kotacase



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst and Porn, Angst with a Happy Ending, Childhood Friends, Fingerfucking, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mutual Pining, Porn With Plot, Porn with Feelings, Trans Character, Trans Felix Hugo Fraldarius, Trans Male Character
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-11
Updated: 2020-08-31
Packaged: 2021-03-06 03:48:22
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 10,125
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25836751
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kotacase/pseuds/kotacase
Summary: The cold was biting, like an angry dog, and it was unforgiving. It crept down through his hood, down his neck, and burrowed itself deep into his bones. No matter how many layers he adorned, how bundled and snug his thick winter coat was, that type of cold would always find its way in.the winter was harsh. it was shelter or death. now, sylvain and felix were stuck together, alone, in a cabin in the middle of the woods. what could go wrong?
Relationships: Felix Hugo Fraldarius & Sylvain Jose Gautier, Felix Hugo Fraldarius/Sylvain Jose Gautier
Comments: 7
Kudos: 80





	1. Chapter 1

Felix stopped being able to feel his fingertips before the sun even reached its peak in the sky. The cold was biting, like an angry dog, and it was unforgiving. It crept down through his hood, down his neck, and burrowed itself deep into his bones. No matter how many layers he adorned, how bundled and snug his thick winter coat was, that type of cold would always find its way in. 

They had left the small village early morning before the sun made its way over the horizon. Most of the village was still asleep as they left, the innkeeper only just rising as they set off on their way. They had to make it back to the monastery as soon as possible, they had dawdled enough on their journey to, and hadn’t left themselves enough dawdling time on their journey from. They underestimated how quickly the snowstorm would be upon them, and now they were stuck in the middle of it. 

At first, they were walking at a distance from each other, searching the woods around them for somewhere to camp out, but as visibility decreased, Sylvain and Felix walked closer together again. It minimized their ability to look for shelter, as now the sun was sinking back into the horizon, and the hope of braving out the storm was going with it. There was no way they would make it through the night without a break from the intense blizzard that swirled around them. 

Out of nowhere, Sylvain grabbed Felix’s arm and stopped walking. The movement was so startling, in the middle of their silent trek, Felix had to swallow a shout. They hadn’t said a word to each other for most of the day, their energy best conserved for walking and searching, but now Sylvain was pulling down the layers of cloth that covered his mouth, having to yell over the screaming winds just to be heard. “I think I see something, stay here.” Then, he walked into the raging snow, disappearing after only a few feet. 

Felix felt a little silly, standing out in the blizzard alone. He knew why he had to stay - because if they both left the path, the path would be completely lost to the forest of white - but as a minute passed, and then another, and Sylvain hadn’t come back, he got antsy. Of course, Sylvain could handle his own against other people, even giant wild beasts he could take on, but he had gotten lost out in the chaos of nature, that was something neither of them was particularly capable of handling. 

Felix counted five minutes of himself standing alone before there was a loud cracking sound. He couldn’t see anything past the treeline, but even over the roaring winds, the sound was unmistakable. It sounded like a tree had been knocked over. Felix unsheathed his sword, instantly at the ready for anything coming his way, but what he didn’t expect was Sylvain appearing back through the snow, appearing almost completely unscathed. 

“So, I may have found something, but I need your help,” Sylvain said as Felix put away his sword. He nodded in response, gesturing for Sylvain to lead the way. He didn’t bother asking about the noise, he was sure he’d figure out what it was soon enough.  
\-----  
It was only about thirty yards past the treeline before Felix saw it, and it took him a moment to take in the sight before him. There was a structure, it looked like a small cabin, nestled into a bundle of trees with thick trunks. It was mostly hidden away, especially behind the piles of branches and logs in the front, but behind all of it, there was a hint of faded red brick shining through. Felix was silently impressed at Sylvain’s sharp eye.

“The debris is blocking the door, I think,” Sylvain said to him, walking up to it. “I tried moving it myself, and kind of made it worse.” He patted a big, heavy-looking log in the middle of all the wood. It almost looked too big to just be a log, it looked like it could have been nearly a whole tree on its own. “Help me clear out the smaller stuff and then we can try to move this one.” He didn’t wait for a response from Felix as he started tossing chunks of bark and branches off to the side, and Felix didn’t give him one as he joined. 

It didn’t take them long, together they cleared out the smaller debris in a few minutes, but as Felix stepped back he could tell the sun wasn’t going to be waiting on them much longer. It would soon sink itself back below the horizon, retiring for the night, leaving them in the dark and unforgiving cold. Felix also noticed, however, there was the shape of a door behind all of the mess they just cleared away. It looked like Sylvain was right.

“At least we know we won’t be intruding on anyone,” Felix said. He didn’t need to elaborate verbally, they both knew if anyone were inside, they had been for a long time. Possibly a little too long. Sylvain shrugged, positioning himself on one end of the large trunk. Felix put himself at the other end, taking a moment to find good handholds.

“On three,” Sylvain yelled to him, seeming to have a good hold on his end. “One.. Two..” With a deep breath, Felix lifted. It was heavy, as expected, even with the both of them. It also didn’t help that Felix mostly couldn’t feel his fingers and all of his joints were stiff from the cold. 

For a moment, it looked like they had it handled. They carefully moved it back from the door, taking it slow and steady. Felix was walking backward as they carried the trunk, Sylvain taking the other end and walking forward. It had lifted fine, but as they took a few steps, the trunk had gotten stuck on something. Together, they tried to pull it free, and on the first heave it wouldn’t give, but on the second, with a mighty crack, the trunk came loose. The problem was, neither of them was prepared for the momentum the trunk gave, and it sent Felix falling backward onto his ass. There was a second, smaller crack, almost like a pop as he landed. It took Felix a moment to register that it had come from his left ankle, where the trunk was now resting. In that same moment, he felt the pain blossoming there, and in his right wrist. The trunk had pulled his wrist in a direction it was supposed to bend on its way down. He bit down hard on his lip, fighting to keep the sound of pain down. 

“Holy shit, Felix.” Sylvain had dropped his end when the trunk had given. Quickly, he had come to Felix’s side, pushing the trunk off of him. For a second, the pain was more intense, the trunk sliding off of his leg, and that time he couldn’t help the strangled grunt that escaped him. “Are you okay?” Sylvain offered his hand down to Felix, and with his good hand, he hauled himself to his feet but grunted again in pain. Putting weight on his left ankle caused shockwaves of agony coursing through it, almost knocking him back on his ass, but he gripped tighter onto Sylvain’s arm.

“I think I sprained my ankle,” He groaned, wobbling now unsteadily on one foot. He shook his head. He didn’t want to also admit there was something wrong with his wrist, it was embarrassing enough to fall right onto his ass and injure his ankle. 

“Alright, let’s get inside then and have a look.” Sylvain helped Felix to the door, having let Felix wrap an arm over his shoulders and holding him by the waist. It was an awkward shuffle through the snow, but the door wasn’t far. They had managed to clear the way from the trunk. With his free hand, Sylvain tried the door, but it didn’t budge. 

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” Felix said flatly. He leaned against the outside of the cabin as Sylvain tried to push with his shoulder to get the door open. “That’s not going to work if it’s locked.”

“I don’t think it’s locked, I think it's just frozen. Hang on.” Sylvain backed up an inch, then shoved all of his weight into the door. There was another cracking noise, but this time it came from the door giving way, opening inward to the small cabin. Sylvain looked at him, and Felix could tell that under all those layers of cloth that he was smiling smugly. He only rolled his eyes and hobbled his way inside, waving away Sylvain’s arm, instead just using the wall as a support. 

“Who leaves their doors unlocked?” Felix grumbled to himself, taking in the space around him. The cabin was relatively small, most likely a hunter’s cabin meant for one. Against the right wall, pushed up against the corner, there was a twin-sized bed with a blue quilt neatly tucked into the sides. In the far left corner there was a table with a chair pushed in, and in the near left corner was a fireplace, looking long devoid of use. Taking up the rest of the empty concrete floor was a faded brown rug. It looked like it had once been soft and thick, but now it seemed matted with time and use. A good layer of dust covered absolutely everything, a good sign that they most likely weren’t intruding on anyone, and their stay would go unnoticed. 

Sylvain followed him inside, pulling the door closed behind him. Now out of the brutal winds, Felix pulled down his hood and breathed a sigh of relief. Their odds of living through the night had just increased. It was good timing too, the sun was saying its final goodbyes to the land for the night. 

“I’ll grab some of the wood from outside, start a fire. We might be out of the cold, but it’s only going to get worse.” Sylvain heaved off his pack, letting it drop gently to the floor and rest against the wall near the door. He kept hold of his lance, however, and turned to Felix. “Mind cleaning up a bit? You don’t have to, but it’d be nice not to breathe in dust all night.” He gave a small laugh, and the sound made Felix’s breath catch. 

“I’m not your maid,” was all he said, however, covering up the fact his heart stuttered in his chest. “Just be quick.” 

Sylvain huffed another laugh before slipping out the door again, the sudden wind coming in sending up a flurry of snow and dust. Quickly, Felix shrugged off his bag, being careful slipping his injured wrist through the straps. He hobbled over to the table and dropped his bag into the chair, making quick work of opening it. He dug through its contents, down to the bottom where he kept his emergency aid supplies. It wasn’t much, but he pulled out the wrap that was included. He set it on the dusty table and shrugged off his thick coat and hung it on the back of the chair, then started rolling up the sleeve of his sweater. 

His wrist was already in deep shades of purple and blue, the colors creeping up the back of his hand. Quickly, he unwound the wrap and began wrapping it around his wrist, vaguely remembering the way they were shown in his days in the academy. There was a short lesson in basic first aid, but Felix didn’t retain most of that knowledge. Once he had run out of wrap, he secured it off and rolled back down his sleeve. It looked bulky, but now it was one less thing he had to burden Sylvain with. 

Turning back to the room, he fully took in how dusty everything was. It was kind of relieving - no one was going to walk in on them sleeping in their cabin, and it was likely their stay would go completely unnoticed. And it wasn’t like they were stealing, just a little breaking and entering. Felix didn’t mind a slight bit of crime if it meant he could continue his life beyond the freezing storm. 

After taking a closer look, he found a small broom and dustpan leaning against the fireplace. It was all he really had to clean with, so he set to work sweeping off the table and the chair. It was awkward to balance it in his one good hand, wobbling unsteadily on one good ankle, and he was glad Sylvain wasn’t there to laugh at him. He shook out the matted rug, letting all the dust and dirt and long passed bugs fall onto the concrete, then dropped the rug into an area he’d already swept up. After he’d swept up the floor as best he could, he pulled the neatly tucked quilt from its place and shook that out too. It was a shame this cabin had been forgotten, the quilt was different shades of beautiful blue, neatly hand-made, likely with a lot of love. But that wasn’t his business. 

He let the blanket drop back onto the bed, then shed the pillow of its case, ready to shake that out too, but as he turned back around, Sylvain came through the door and let the wind send up another flurry of snow and his once neat pile of dust. Felix frowned and gave Sylvain a glare, then just shook his head. “Well, so much for that. I did my part, you can fix what you’ve done.” Felix shook out the case still in his hand, letting more dust pile onto the floor. Sylvain pulled the door closed and piled up an armful of fuel for their fire next to the fireplace. It was hard to see the brightness of the red in his hair under all of the snow that stuck there. 

“My bad, maybe you should have swept faster.” He gave Felix a cool smile and shook out his hair, melting droplets flying everywhere. Felix rolled his eyes, holding the broom out to Sylvain to take. After shedding his jacket and laying it on top of Felix’s, tucking his loose winter garments into his pockets, he took the broom and began to fix his mess. 

“I’ll get a fire going, even out of the wind I can feel the temperature dropping.” Felix carefully stepped around Sylvain’s sweeping and went back to his bag, digging around now for the small pack of matches. It was an easy find, he kept his bag organized enough to know where everything was. He pulled them out and closed his bag off again, then gently lowered himself to the concrete floor to sit while he started the fire. Wobbling around on his one good leg made that leg start to ache, and even though the concrete was as cold as sitting on the snow outside itself, he was glad for the reprieve. 

Carefully, he began to break off small twigs from the pile that Sylvain brought in, setting up a small structure with them in the firepit. He had to start small, and it wasn’t too hard to do with one hand, stacking the small pieces on each other. The problem came when he went to light the match, he held the pack between two fingers on his bad side and tried to strike, but he couldn’t get a good enough grip in his fingers without sending small shockwaves of pain up his arm. It took several tries and two broken matches before he got it, and by that point, he could feel Sylvain standing behind him, not exactly staring, but observing. Whatever he may have noticed, however, he kept to himself.  
\---  
After a half-hour, Felix had a good-sized fire going. Sylvain had set himself up in the chair after setting the rug back into its place, and now instead of sitting on solid concrete, he had the matted carpet under him to buffer the numbing cold. He was starting to get feeling back into his hands, and as much as he appreciated the warmth, it allowed the deep ache to settle itself in his sprains. It was getting hard to keep his expressions neutral and the pain off of his face, but after their prolonged silence and waiting for the fire to warm them, Sylvain must have noticed the intense glare Felix held into the fire.

“Want me to wrap your ankle now? It won’t heal right if you don’t keep it steady.” He was already digging through his bag for his medical supplies, not giving Felix much of a choice. 

“Fine,” was all he gave in response, struggling to bring himself back to his feet. Sylvain, however, lifted Felix up as he unsteadily tried to stand and carried him over to the bed. 

Felix was caught off guard, stunned by the sudden contact, the closeness. He could feel the warmth Sylvain radiated already, after such a short time of having heat. It made Felix almost unable to breathe until it was quickly over and he was set onto the bed. “That was completely unnecessary, I could make it over myself,” he said after his brain caught up to the present, pushing out the feelings fluttering in his chest. 

“It was just faster than watching you struggle,” Sylvain laughed as he pulled the chair over. He sat down and propped Felix’s bad ankle in his lap, then began to unwind the wrap. Felix rolled his eyes again, crossing his arms over his chest, letting his right just rest on top of his left. 

As he began to wrap, Sylvain looked up for a moment, and Felix could see him taking notice of the bulk under his sleeve. He was nothing if not observant, after all their years tangled so tightly in each other’s lives being able to read Felix like an open book. All the while, Felix still had a hard time making any sense of what goes on behind Sylvain’s big brown eyes. Maybe it was the fact that any time he felt those eyes on him, his chest got tight and it became hard to think of anything at all. 

“So, are you going to tell me what that’s about?” Sylvain asked, nodding toward his wrist. 

“No, because it doesn’t matter.” Felix kept his arms crossed, meeting Sylvain’s gaze. He couldn't tell what the emotions were swirling behind his eyes, but he saw them there.

“Doesn’t it, though?” Sylvain secured the wrap around his ankle but didn’t move it off his lap. He kept one hand resting on Felix’s leg, keeping him in place there. 

Felix couldn’t stop another roll of his eyes, a small heat rising in his cheeks from being so close under Sylvain’s scrutiny. “It doesn’t, it's just a little scrape.” He tried to gently slide his ankle away, wanting to leave the conversation completely, but Sylvain didn’t give. 

“If it’s not a problem, then you shouldn’t mind showing me.” The tone in Sylvian’s voice sounded like a parent talking to a stubborn child, and it made Felix wrinkle his nose. That was exactly what he wanted to avoid. With a sigh, he tugged up his sleeve and began unwrapping his wrist. As the wrap peeled away and the deep purple and blue were exposed, he heard Sylvain take a sharp breath. “Goddess, Felix, what the hell? Why didn’t you say anything?” 

“Because it’s nothing, I’ll stop to see a healer when we get back to the monastery. You don’t need to worry about it.” He started to wrap his wrist back up, but a soft hand stopped him. 

“Please, let me help.” Sylvain’s voice was softer now, not in a way that was pitying, but in a way that was genuine concern. The sentiment confused Felix, he didn’t understand why Sylvain was so worried, or why he wanted so badly to help. 

“What can you even do, Sylvain?” He could feel his irritation getting the best of him, but Sylvain's pushing made him feel shame for hiding something so silly.

Sylvain huffed a small laugh like he knew something Felix didn’t, and that made Felix tilt his head. “Underestimating me? I’m insulted.” He let up on Felix’s ankle, one hand now hovering over the wrap there, and one hovering over his injured wrist. He closed his eyes, and for a second there was only the crackle of fire and Felix watching Sylvain with confusion, but after a moment there was a soft, blue glow. It was emanating from Sylvain’s hands, it was small, but Felix watched as Sylvain’s eyes closed tighter and the glow reached out to his injuries, surrounding his skin in the glow. It felt warm and tingly around his wrist, and he watched the bruising there lighten just the smallest bit, and the throbbing in his ankle eased. It didn’t last long, but when the glow faded, Felix realized what Sylvain had done.

“When did you learn to heal?” he asked softly. 

Sylvain gave him a soft smile, opening his eyes again. “I only started learning how a few weeks ago. That’s probably the best I can do for tonight, though.” He gently took Felix’s wrist and began to wrap it back up. 

Felix was finding it hard to find words, the image of the blue glow reflecting on Sylvain’s features vivid in his mind. “Why?” was all he could find. 

“For you, Felix.” Sylvain gently secured the wrap on his wrist, then moved his ankle from his lap and stood. He wouldn’t meet Felix’s gaze again. 

As Sylvain began to open his bag, Felix couldn’t wrap his head around his words. He didn’t understand why Sylvain would go out of his way to learn how to heal, just for him. They got hurt all the time in battle, there was always someone out to help, healers already long trained to do what they needed. Why did Sylvain feel like he had to do that? 

Felix couldn’t think of anything to say, so instead, he stood and hobbled his way back to the fireplace and lowered himself to the floor. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Sylvain shedding himself of everything but his underclothes. He neatly folded his winter gear and stacked it all up on the table, then dug around in his bag for a moment before pulling out a pair of flannel pajama bottoms. He didn’t even bother looking back towards Felix to make sure he was turned, just began to change right there. Felix couldn’t help but admire Sylvain’s lack of shame, among other things. When he was done, Felix busied himself with stoking the fire, pretending he had been doing that the whole time. Sylvain turned to him.

“You should sleep soon, the earlier we get up, the better chance we have at making it to the monastery before nightfall.” Felix looked up at him, noticing now how tired Sylvain seemed. He wondered for a moment if he looked so exhausted because of him. He nodded in response, and Sylvain went over and tucked himself into the bed. Seeing one of them now laying there, it seemed impossible that they were going to share that space. Even pressed against the wall, Sylvain took up most of the bed. “Goodnight,” Sylvain said softly, turning his back to Felix and pulling the quilt over himself. It seemed sleep was quickly taking him over.

“Goodnight,” Felix responded with the same softness, turning back to the fire. He waited until he could hear Sylvain’s soft snores before taking his advice, getting up to rifle through his bag. He pulled out his own pajama bottoms, then braced himself against the table as he changed into them. He struggled a bit pulling his tight leggings he wore under all his winter gear off, and it took him a good five minutes to do so, but once he was comfortably in his pajamas he hobbled back over to the fire. As quietly as he could, he stoked the fire until he was certain it would burn all night. It took most of the remaining stack Sylvain had brought in, but he deemed that a problem for the next day. 

He took a breath, then made his way over to the bed. His good ankle was getting sore again from the balancing act, so when he sat on the small bed, he quickly tried to make himself comfortable. Even with his back pressed against Sylvain’s, he was on the edge of the mattress. One wrong move in the night and Felix would be getting a face full of the matted rug. He braced himself as much as he could, all his muscles stiff to keep himself from rolling off. It was likely to be a long night.

Felix had resigned himself to being uncomfortable for the night, his eyes closing, the reds and oranges of the firelight dancing behind his eyelids, when he felt a shift in the mattress. He’d prepared himself, ready to fall right off, but instead, he felt the warmth of Sylvain’s arm wrapping itself around his waist and pulling him into his chest. Being fitted together like this, there was enough room for them both to be comfortable, but Felix didn’t even register that. All he could think of was Sylvain’s intense warmth surrounding him and the hammering of his heart in his chest.

Sylvain didn’t make any indication that he was awake, his soft snores continuing on, his gentle breath falling down the back of Felix’s neck. On a typical day, any touch from Sylvain made Felix’s skin feel like it was tingling with the softest of electricity. A gentle hand on his shoulder, on his arm, always made his breath stop, but this new situation made him feel like he was never going to be able to breathe again. He could feel the heat rising high into his cheeks and to his ears, and he was afraid for a fleeting moment that the thundering of his heartbeat was going to wake Sylvain. 

It took a while, but after Felix was certain Sylvain was definitely not waking up, he took a long, quiet breath. He needed to get his heart under control, but every time he focused in on the heat surrounding him, the heaviness of Sylvain’s arm around his waist, all his efforts went up into the wind. He decided instead to watch the flames in the fireplace dance slowly, the soft crackle and the winds roaring outside a distracting lullaby. Of course, he couldn’t completely ignore the weight around him or the tickle of Sylvain’s breath on his neck, but all of those things together made his eyes close slowly, and his mind drifted into the clouds of dreamland.


	2. Chapter 2

When next Felix opened his eyes, a small amount of light was streaming in through the small window, and the warmth around him had vanished. He noticed while wiping the sleep out of his eyes, that Sylvain wasn’t there at all anymore. He, his winter gear, and his lance were all missing, but his bag was still left where it had been the previous night. He figured Sylvain hadn’t gone too far, but Felix was worried about what that meant. He could be just taking care of his business, but since the sun was already up and he’d left Felix asleep in the cabin, it wasn’t seeming likely they would have a shot at making it back to the monastery. 

Felix sighed and ran his fingers through his hair, sitting up. It took him a moment to remember, he’d fallen asleep with his hair still up. He patted around and under the pillow, trying to find where it had untangled itself from his hair, but he ended up empty-handed. He furrowed his brows and stood, then hobbled over to the fire, trying to ignore the strange flutters in his chest. This wasn’t the first time he’d lost a hair tie, and it certainly wouldn’t be the last, but it was the only one he’d had with him. 

The fire was still going steady, a good sign that Sylvain hadn’t been gone too long. Felix pulled over the chair from the table and set it in front of the fire, then went to his bag that was resting next to Sylvain’s on top of the table. There, sticking out from underneath, he found a small leaf of paper with some scrawlings on it. Felix pulled it free, reading the small note left for him. “Went out for more wood, be back soon. -Sylvain.” He nodded to himself, then began to rifle through the contents of his bag. There, at the bottom, he found the novel he had brought with him.

Back in their academy days, Ashe had talked with him once about fantastic tales of heroic knights and chivalry. Back then, Felix only thought of it as nonsense, the glorification of death in the name of heroism. He knew now that he was still blinded by pain then, letting his undealt with grief make him reject those stories, overwhelm him with disgust. Over time, he’d reread the stories his brother had told him as a child, letting himself grieve and surround himself in those memories, and he let himself enjoy those stories for what they were - just stories. He’d continue to read, and after coming back to the monastery he’d talked with Ashe about the things he’d read, every so often taking a new recommendation from him. 

It wasn’t something he’d really talked with anyone else about, only reading when he was alone and had nothing better to do with his time, but on his travels with Sylvain, there were often times when there was nothing to be done. Sylvain never questioned his reading habits, never even raised an eyebrow at a title. He never batted an eye at the new, thick book he’d carried with him every time they went out. Felix didn’t feel the need to explain himself, and Sylvain never asked, and he was happy with it that way.

Felix set the book on the table, then tugged on a sweater from his bag. Even with the fire going, the morning chill had snuck its way into the cabin and was starting to make his teeth chatter. He’d also grabbed the quilt off from the bed and wrapped it around himself, then sat in the chair in front of the fire and began to read. 

\---

It was only a few chapters later when Felix heard pushing at the door, and he was so engrossed in his book that for a second his heart almost stopped before he remembered that he was waiting for someone. That someone shoved at the door again, swinging it open, bringing with him a flurry of freezing winter winds and a small blizzard. Even in the few seconds the door was open before Sylvain was kicking it closed, all of the heat Felix had accumulated was sucked out of him and replaced with ice. He stood, moving out of the way for Sylvain to unload the armful of cut wood and loose branches onto the floor. He was so covered in snow that Felix could barely see any hints of his fiery red hair sticking out from under his hood. 

“Good morning sleeping beauty,” Sylvain said as he shucked off his hood, sending more snow clumps flying. Felix could now see that Sylvain’s cheeks and nose were bright red, the melting snow in his hair making it look like he’d taken a freezing cold shower. 

“You were gone long enough, I was starting to think you had gotten lost.” He guided Sylvain to take his seat in front of the fire, a little unsteadily, making Sylvain laugh. 

“I almost got lost, actually, but I found a whole stack of cut wood at the back of this place.” Sylvain started taking off his heavier winter clothing, letting more and more snow loose, little wet flakes landing on Felix as he did. “It was almost buried in the snow, speaking of which,” Sylvain shook out his hair like a wet dog, making Felix cringe and make a noise of disgust, “we aren’t going anywhere today. The snow was almost to my knees, you would’ve gotten buried.” He looked up at Felix, who was now leaning against the table to take the pressure off of his injured ankle, and gave him a grin. Felix rolled his eyes, feigning annoyance and looking away to hide his flush.

“You’re unbelievable, what would you have done if you’d gotten lost? What would I have done? I was worried about you.” He mumbled the last bit under his breath, but he could see that out of the corner of his eyes, Sylvain heard him and his grin widened. Before he could say anything more, Felix tossed the quilt that was still in his hands over Sylvain’s head, then hobbled his way back over to the bed. He could hear Sylvain’s laughter as he did so. 

“Everything’s fine, Fe, don’t worry about it. Tomorrow should be better.” He sounded completely unbothered, even though Felix knew he had to be frozen to the core, and he could feel his own anxieties about being stuck in the middle of the forest during a blizzard creeping into his chest. 

For a while they sat in silence, Felix sitting on the bed again, back to reading his book, and Sylvain warming himself by the fire. Eventually, Sylvain had warmed enough to where he was back in only his first layer, just a sweater and his pajama bottoms from the previous night. Felix realized then that he was also still in his pajamas, but felt no obligation to change seeing as they were spending another night in the cabin. They might as well stay as comfortable as possible. 

After another few chapters in his book, Sylvain turned to him. “Have you eaten yet?” Felix shook his head.

“No, I was waiting for you.” Sylvain stood and went over to their bags, then pulled something out of his bag, then pulled something out of Felix’s and went over to sit next to him on the bed. He handed Felix his rations, something they had left from the village they visited a few days prior. A very kind woman Sylvain had been talking to had prepared them for the two, asking nothing from them except for their safe travels. Felix briefly wondered how she was fairing with the winter storm that was upon them. “Thank you.” 

They ate together in silence, Sylvain watching the fire, Felix flipping through his book as he ate. When they were finished, Sylvain gently took Felix’s injured wrist into his hands. “How do they feel today? Any better?” 

Felix tried to ignore the warmth he could feel from Sylvain’s fingers against his skin as they unwound the wrap. “They ache, but they aren’t as bad as yesterday. Probably for the best we couldn’t leave today, I don’t think I’m able to walk on it yet.” The wrap fell into Sylvain’s lap once it was loose, and in the light of morning coming in through the small window, the bruises looked fairly nasty. He could see Sylvain purse his lips. 

“Definitely for the best. As much as I’d love to, I don’t think I could carry you all the way back to the monastery. Sorry to crush your dreams.” He gave Felix a wry smile, but the idea still made his heart stutter. He hated how easily Sylvain made his train of thought come to an abrupt end.

“How terrible,” he grumbled. Sylvain turned his wrist in his hands, taking in how bad it looked. Felix thought it looked worse than it felt, but when Sylvain lightly pressed his thumb into his wrist, tendrils of pain shocked his nerves, making him wince and bite back a grunt. “Careful.” Sylvain looked at him with raised eyebrows. 

“Is it that bad?” Sylvain asked. Felix cursed him and himself silently. 

“You shouldn’t prod at an injury,” he huffed instead of answering the question. Sylvain sighed softly and closed his eyes, a moment passing before the soft blue glow encased his wrist. Even washed out in the light of morning, the sight of the glow reflected on Sylvain’s face made his chest tighten and he had to force himself to look away to avoid being caught staring. It didn’t last long, the glow fading back to nothing as Sylvain opened his eyes. 

“Better?” Sylvain asked, beginning to wrap his wrist back up, and Felix nodded as he watched Sylvain wrap. For a moment, he could see Sylvain working in the infirmary, healing him after a hard battle. He quickly switched his brain to think about his book. “Prop your leg up,” he instructed Felix after securing the wrap, patting his lap. Felix moved so he could comfortably rest his ankle in Sylvain’s lap, and he began the same process he did with Felix’s wrist. 

“How often can you do that?” Felix asked.

“A few times a day, depending on the day. We spent most of yesterday walking, so I didn’t have much energy left to help you with.” Sylvain let the wrap drop and gently rolled up the end of Felix’s pajamas, exposing the dark bruising that matched his wrist. This seemed almost worse, however. His ankle was swollen, and even as Sylvain gently laid his fingers on his skin, he grunted in pain. 

“Shit,” he hissed through his teeth. Sylvain immediately drew his fingers away, and in a fleeting thought, Felix wished he hadn’t. Even though it hurt, his touch was welcome. Comforting, even.

“We definitely were not going anywhere today.” Sylvain laughed under his breath, but it sounded dry. He closed his eyes once more and the blue glow faded back in, instantly soothing away the pulsing pain Sylvain’s fingers had left behind. It was so relieving, Felix breathed out in a soft sigh. Even if Sylvain wasn’t the strongest healer, Felix wouldn’t have wanted anyone else to do this for him. 

As the blue faded away and Sylvain began to wrap his ankle again, Felix noticed the hair tie around Sylvain’s wrist. He had to stop himself from asking about it, he knew where it had come from. Sylvain never tied his hair back, even with all the times Mercedes has played with his hair and tied it in ways even Felix would admit were cute, he never had a tie with him. It was Felix’s. Of course, he could have just found it loose on the bed and held onto it so it wouldn’t get lost. That was the rational thing, and Felix didn’t want to ask about it because he worried that was the answer he would get. 

“Thank you,” Felix said as Sylvain secured the wrap at his ankle. 

“Of course. I can try again tonight, we won’t be doing much today so I might have a bit more magic left in me.” He smiled and wiggled his fingers at Felix, who just rolled his eyes and slid his foot out of Sylvain’s lap. 

“That sounds like an awful pick-up line,” he grumbled as he picked his book back up. 

Sylvain stood, walking back to the table to begin digging through his bag. “Who said it wasn’t?” Sylvain’s back was facing Felix, and for that, he was very grateful, because he couldn’t help the sudden and intense flush that rose into his cheeks. He knew Sylvain was only joking, but Sylvain wasn’t aware of how badly Felix wished he wasn’t. It took a second for him to remember how to breathe, and by that time, Sylvain had turned back to him, holding up a deck of cards. If he noticed the deep red filling his cheeks, he didn’t mention it. “Want to play?”

Felix shrugged nonchalantly, setting his book back onto the bed. “Alright, it’s not like we have much else to do.” With the smile Sylvain gave him in response, Felix almost swore his heart completely stopped.

\---

After five years away, when all of his former classmates came back to the monastery, they had all come back having each learned the same thing: how to play cards. They all knew different types of games, the cards games all differed from every region in Fódlan, even a few coming from outside the country. They’d all spend free nights teaching each other the tricks they’d learned, the gambling techniques some of them had picked up. It was all fun, one of their only ways to relax in the midst of a trying war. 

Sylvain was one for card games, his smooth personality really shining when betting on cards, and he’d made quick work of learning anything new his peers could possibly teach him. Felix, on the other hand, was not as social and quick to learn those games. He hated losing, and it wasn’t about losing a silver or two, he just hated looking like a fool at the hand of luck. It was, of course, Sylvain he would continue to play cards with. It was something he wanted to master, wanted to prove himself at, even though he knew cards meant nothing and it was solely his pride. 

They played cards well into the evening, Sylvain taking the lead in how many rounds he’s won, that was no surprise, but Felix had surprised himself with winning a few rounds. He couldn’t gauge if Sylvain was letting him win, his poker face was impeccable, but Felix was taking the win. Sylvain even took the time to teach Felix how to play a new game, likely a game he picked up from a local at the last village they passed through. That was just Sylvain, he could talk to anyone and everyone, coax others’ knowledge right out of them. Felix liked taking in the second-hand knowledge, mostly just to hear Sylvain speak.

“Had enough yet?” Sylvain asked him with a big smirk; he’d just won another game. 

“I’ve had enough of your gloating, yes.” Felix put his cards down with a roll of his eyes. 

Sylvain chuckled softly. “Alright.” He gathered up the deck into a neat pile and slid them back into their box. They had dragged over the small table to rest in front of the bed, Sylvain sitting with his back to the fireplace in the chair, Felix resting on the bed with his injured ankle propped up to his side. The whole time they played, the roar of the wind outside never ceased, never quieted, even a little. “Maybe I should go get more wood before the sun goes down?” Sylvain suggested. 

“That wouldn’t be a bad idea.” They had gone through a good amount of what Sylvain had brought in that morning, battling with the cold wanting to creep inside was not making the task of conserving fuel easy. Sylvain nodded and stood, taking the table with him. He set the table back in the corner, then put their bags back on top. He slid the deck of cards back into his pack, then took Felix’s book from his bag and handed it back to him.

“So you don’t have to get back up,” he said as Felix took it. Felix nodded and thanked him, then adjusted himself into a more comfortable reading position on the bed. As he opened his book to where he left off, Sylvain began to layer on his winter clothing again, preparing as much as he could for the blizzard still raging outside. 

Felix really did try to focus on the story, or at least that’s what he told himself, but over the top of his book, just on the very edge of his vision, he could see the little raise in Sylvain’s sweater as he layered up. The hem sliding up past his hips, just over the waistband of his bottoms, showing the smooth skin there. Felix noticed the little dip into his v-line, and then the hem of Sylvain’s sweater was back down and covered up with a coat. He seemed just oblivious as he was the previous night to Felix’s staring, and he forced himself to look away before that changed, but he still couldn’t focus himself on his book. 

Once Sylvain was all bundled up, he slung his lance over his shoulder and turned to Felix. “I won’t go far, so don’t worry about me,” he laughed. Felix glared at him, making him smile wider. “There was a good stack in the back, I shouldn’t be long.” He had his hand on the knob.

“Be careful out there,” Felix said sincerely. Even under all the layers he adorned, Felix could still make out the light of a smile in Sylvain’s eyes. He nodded once, then rushed out the door to minimize the flurry that followed him. A quick chill rushed in and down Felix’s sweater, making him shudder. 

It took him a few minutes, but after Sylvain was gone, he was able to engross himself back into the story of his book. He got through another chapter, then half of one, before he felt the heaviness of his eyes. The warmth of the cabin around him, the soothing sound of the winds outside, and the lull in his book had made his mind drift, and when he noticed it, the tiredness of his body took him over. He marked his place in his book and closed it, then slid himself under the cover of the quilt. He set his book on the floor next to him, closing his eyes for just a small nap before Sylvain got back.

\---

As Felix rolled over and opened his eyes, he saw Sylvain sitting at the table, writing something in a notebook. Sylvain looked up at him and noticed him waking, then smiled wide. “Good morning sleeping beauty,” he said as he flipped the notebook closed. Felix sat up, noticing that there was no light coming in from the window anymore. 

“How long was I asleep?” He rubbed at his eyes, trying to wipe away the remnants of his nap.

“Just a few hours.” Sylvain shrugged, still with a small smile. It made Felix’s stomach twist. 

“Hours? You let me sleep that long?” He sighed a long sigh. He didn’t mean to sleep so long, he wanted to be awake when Sylvain had gotten back. 

“You’re injured, Fe, you need to rest. Especially if we’re taking that trek back to the monastery tomorrow.” Sylvain got up and sat next to him on the bed, then motioned for Felix to prop his ankle in his lap. “Let’s try a little more healing.” 

As he unwrapped Felix’s ankle and the dark bruising underneath was exposed, Sylvain asked him, “Think you’ll be able to make it tomorrow?” Felix could feel the deep throbbing in both injuries still, even with only having rested the whole day and Sylvain having healed him once already. They were still sprains, and trudging through the snow with how sore his ankle was wasn’t the most pleasant thought, but looking weak in front of Sylvain wasn’t too appealing to him either. He didn’t want Sylvain to worry about him any more than he already had.

“I’ll be alright if we leave tomorrow, they’re already feeling a bit better. I think you’re healing has helped a lot.” He tried to shrug it away, but Sylvain looked up at him doubtfully. 

“Come on, don’t lie to me, Felix.” 

“I’m not lying, I’ll be alright to-” he winced hard when Sylvain gently prodded the tender skin. 

He sighed softly. “It’s okay to need help.”

Something flared in Felix’s chest, suddenly making him indignant. “I don’t need your help, thank you.” He would have tried to tug his ankle away, but Sylvain held him there.

“I know that’s a load of bullshit. Please, just let me help you.” He sounded almost like he was hurt, and that made Felix stop for a moment. 

“Why? Why are you so insistent?” 

“It’s really not obvious to you? You really just don’t know?” Sylvain pursed his lips like he was considering something. All of it just made Felix utterly confused. He had no idea what Sylvain was trying to say or why he wanted to help him so badly, he just couldn’t understand why Sylvain would want to take any of Felix’s burden from him and add it to his own. He shook his head, almost exasperated. 

“I have absolutely no idea what you’re going on about.” Felix ran his fingers through his hair, all of this mess being thrown at him only minutes after a long nap he didn’t intend to take, making him wish he had stayed asleep. 

“Goddess, you’re oblivious,” Sylvain said flatly. He gently shifted Felix’s injured ankle onto the bed next to himself. 

Felix raised his eyebrows. “Excuse-” Then Sylvain was in his personal space, leaning up in between his legs, and kissing him. He’d placed one hand on the bed next to Felix’s hip, and he was kissing him. Felix could feel his heart beating in his throat, choking him, making him completely unable to respond. Sylvain’s lips felt warm and soft against his, softer than Felix had ever dreamt of, scrambling any coherent thoughts he had. He swore he was still dreaming, never having woken up. Any second, Sylvain would wake him up coming back in with the wood he’d brought, he was just still napping. But then Sylvain was drawing away from him, worry traced into every feature on his face. For the first time he could remember, what he saw in Sylvain’s eyes was fear. 

“I’m so sorry, you can forget- you don’t-” The hurt he saw in Sylvain immediately righted Felix’s thoughts, making him realize that the warmth he felt against his lips was definitely real, and that the person he’d admired since he was a child thought he had been wrong to kiss him. He curled his fingers into the front of Sylvain’s sweater and pulled him back again, then kissed him hard. He wanted so badly to feel that warmth again. 

For a moment, it seemed like Sylvain was finally the one caught off guard, before he was kissing him again. Felix slowly uncurled his fingers from Sylvain’s sweater and gently rested his hand against his cheek, wanting to confirm for himself again that he was awake, that their kiss was real. His cheek was warm under his touch, and Felix’s heart stuttered. The hand Sylvain had on the bed next to him was moved to Felix’s hip, almost as if he was trying to pull Felix in closer to him.

After a long silence behind the two of them kissing, Felix pulled back to take a deep and steadying breath. His head was spinning, and for a second after pulling away he caught Sylvain’s gaze, making the heat rise in his cheeks. He also saw the blinding grin Sylvain was giving him, making him dizzy. 

“You have no idea how long I’ve dreamt of that,” Felix said softly, looking down at his hands. He felt as if the moment was going to break, that Sylvain was going to snap out of whatever came over him and he was going to push him away. But instead, Sylvain gently guided Felix to look back up at him, making his blush deepen even more. 

“I could say the same.” He chuckled softly, looking amused. The butterflies in Felix’s stomach were thrown into a frenzy. “I care for you, more than you could ever know. I hate seeing you hurt, and I know when you’re lying to me, Fe. I know you better than anyone.” He pulled away and seated himself back where he’d been, then took Felix’s ankle back into his lap. 

“I don’t need to be your burden.” Felix pressed his lips together. 

“You aren’t a burden to me. I want to help, and seeing you hurt hurts me.” Sylvain was looking down at the deep bruises on his ankle, sadness written all over his face. When it was put that way, Felix understood. He wanted to be strong enough to protect everyone he cared for, so he would never have to see them hurt. He never considered that anyone would feel that way about him.

“Oh,” he whispered, looking back down at his hands. Sylvain chuckled again, this time short and gentle, before he closed his eyes and focused. The blue glow curled itself around Felix’s ankle, this time looking brighter than it had before. The throbbing up his nerves was soothed, the pain being almost entirely numbed. A second later, the glow was fading, and Sylvain was wrapping his ankle again.

The process repeated for his wrist, the glow just as intense as it was a moment before, the same soothing numbness taking over his nerves. Once his wrist was wrapped again, Sylvain placed a small, gentle kiss over it. “Do you understand now?” He asked him. Felix rolled his eyes and looked away, the gesture catching him off guard and making him flustered.

“You’re a fool,” he huffed.

“But you like this fool,” Sylvain teased. Felix was surprised by how brazen he was being, and the expression he made must have been amusing, because Sylvain laughed at his reaction, the sound filling the cabin around them. 

“Goddess, help me.” Felix sighed, shaking his head. Sylvain patted his thigh and stood, a goofy smile still painted on his features. 

“How about some dinner?”

\---

They sat side by side on the bed to eat, Sylvain scooting close enough to Felix that their knees were touching. Felix was still unable to wrap his head around everything that had happened between them. Every time he tried to, he just remembered the soft warmth against his lips, and his thoughts were rescrambled.

Once they had finished eating, Sylvain stood once more and stretched. Felix again caught a small glimpse of soft skin from his sweater rising too high, but this time, Sylvain caught his eye and smirked a little. He quickly moved his gaze to the fire, the warmth in his cheeks blazing hotter than the flames in the pit. 

“Want to play some more cards?” Sylvain asked, the smirk still playing on the corners of his lips. Felix scoffed.

“How can you act as if this is nothing to you?” He rolled his eyes. Sylvain was acting almost as if nothing had just happened, as if the events of their last twenty minutes were typical. Sylvain was a flirt with nearly everyone, maybe Felix was just a fool for thinking himself special. That thought scared him.

“Is that what you think?” Sylvain faced him. “You really think this is nothing to me? After all of that, you still don’t believe me, do you?” 

Felix bit the inside of his cheek. “What makes me any different from everyone else you’ve kissed?” He hated the way the words sounded coming from him, insecurity laced in his voice. 

Sylvain leaned down close to him, placing his hands on the bed next to Felix’s sides. All of his personal space was filled with just Sylvain, his closeness practically forcing eye contact. “Because it’s you, Felix,” he whispered. “It’s always been you.” Sylvain kissed him again, but not as gently as he had the first time. He kissed Felix hard enough to get a point across, that this was different to him, and Felix kissed him back with the same force. He felt something squeeze in his chest, making him want to take everything Sylvain could give him. He wanted to kiss Sylvain until both of their lips were bruised, until neither of them could breathe, until the sun came up again and washed them with early morning light. For nearly two decades, all he could ever dream of was this, all he ever wanted was becoming real right in front of him, and he wanted to squeeze this moment of everything it was worth. 

Sylvain lifted his knee on the bed and leaned against Felix, forcing him to lay back against the bed. For a moment, Sylvain was hovering over him, kissing him hard, before Felix felt his hands grabbing at his waist and flipping their positions. Sylvain had sat on the bed and pulled Felix into his lap, resting on his knees, steadying himself on Sylvain’s shoulder with his good hand. They had to break their kiss for only a second, just for Felix to regain the breath he’d lost, before they’d kissed again with the same intensity. 

Felix swore Sylvain could feel his pulse racing with how close they were. He could definitely feel Sylvain’s warmth surrounding him and the sturdiness of his shoulder under his fingers. As they kissed, he slowly ran his fingers down Sylvain’s arm, feeling the muscles there under his sweater. Felix knew he had them, of course, he’d seen them more times than he could count, and every time it made him a little hot under the collar, but it was something entirely new to feel them under his fingers. Sylvain must have been having the same thoughts, because suddenly Felix felt his fingertips graze underneath his sweater. He jumped slightly, breaking away from their kiss with a small gasp. 

“Is this okay?” Sylvain asked him, his fingers frozen in their place. Felix couldn’t find his voice, instead only able to nod as a response. It made Sylvain smirk again, making Felix push into another kiss just so he wouldn’t have to look at his dumb expression. 

In stark contrast to their kiss, Sylvain’s touch was gentle. His fingers moved slowly over his skin, Felix unable to hold back the small sigh that escaped him. He felt Sylvain’s smile against his lips, and Felix felt the impulse to wipe away his smug smile. He acted on that impulse and bit Sylvain’s lower lip, his intent granted, but not at all in the way he expected. Sylvain pressed harder into the kiss, the once soft and gentle touch of his fingers on his waist suddenly tightening, grabbing at his hips and pulling him down roughly. The movement pulled a startled moan out of Felix, sparks of electricity blossoming in his lower belly. 

“If you want to play like that, we can play like that,” Sylvain said softly against Felix’s lips. His voice was low, deeper than Felix had ever heard, and it raised goosebumps all over his skin. 

Before he could say anything in response, however, Felix yawned unexpectedly. The sudden break in tension made Sylvain laugh again, his thumbs rubbing gentle circles into the skin of his hips. “Quiet,” he grumbled, heating burning high in his cheeks and up to his ears. 

“Let’s get you back to bed, princess,” Sylvain laughed and patted Felix’s leg. He glared at him as he shifted himself off of Sylvain’s lap. 

“I swear to the Goddess above…” Felix trailed off, shaking his head. His brain was still too fogged up to come up with any real threat, so instead, he got situated under the quilt, taking the spot against the wall. 

Sylvain stood, then went to the fireplace to feed the fire, giving it enough fuel to burn throughout the night. Felix watched as he did so, his thoughts swirling with how handsome Sylvain was with the light of the flames dancing across his features. He still couldn’t believe it, Sylvain reciprocated the feelings Felix had felt for him all that time. So many years they wasted at the academy, dancing around those feelings. 

When Sylvain seemed happy with how the fire was, he straightened and went back to the bed. He noticed that Felix took his spot from the previous night and shook his head. “You have to promise not to kick me out of the bed in the middle of the night.”

Felix rolled over to face the wall, hiding his small smile. “I can’t make that promise.”

Sylvain crawled under the quilt behind him, wrapping his arm around Felix’s waist. “Then I guess I’ll just have to take you with me,” he whispered. His breath on the back of his neck made him shudder. 

“Go to sleep.” Felix closed his eyes, trying to ignore the warm security of Sylvain’s arm around him and the chill he got with every breath he took. 

Sylvain chuckled softly, puffing another breath down his skin. It was almost driving him crazy. “Goodnight.”

“Goodnight.” 

It wasn’t long before Felix drifted off, his dreams filled with things he would never admit to aloud.

**Author's Note:**

> ive been workin on this thing for a while now lads, and im excited to finally have something to show for it! let me know what u guys think, also just so u know, the horny stuff happens in the last chapter. i promise its gonna happen, just stick with me


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